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                         January 28, 2002


                    The Top 10 Pet Terrorists


 10> Hamasters: Plan to take over the world as soon as they break
     free from that darn ball

  9> Black Panters

  8> Hizballhasa Apso: Will bite the imperialist hand that
     feeds them

  7> M'ow M'ow

  6> Aquatic Jihad: Death to all air-breathers that tap on
     the glass!

  5> Studs for a Democratic Society - Fighting to pick their own
     dates

  4> The Tailban - a violent pro-Manx organization

  3> Pulyerhedin: Purely defensive organization of terrapin
     freedom-fighters

  2> The Branch Amphibians


             and the Number 1 Pet Terrorist Group...


  1> The Tunabomber


              [   Copyright 2002 by Chris White    ]
              [       http://www.topfive.com       ]


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Selected from 57 submissions from 20 contributors.
Today's Top5 Pets List authors are:
------------------------------------------------------------------
Greg Pearson, Arlington, VA        -- 1 (2nd #1)
Bill Strider, Gaithersburg, MD     -- 2, Runner Up list name
Kevin Paul Wickart, Normal, IL     -- 3, 10
James Knowles, Bellingham, WA      -- 4
Judith E. Cottrill, Bronx, NY      -- 5
Adam Chunn, Houston, TX            -- 6
Martin Bredeck, Hybla Valley, VA   -- 7
Paul Paternoster, Los Altos, CA    -- 8
Wade Kwon, Birmingham, AL          -- 9
Kathy Good, Scottsdale, AZ         -- 10
Patrick O'Driscoll, St Louis, MO   -- 10
Melanie Stephens, Manassas, VA     -- Topic
Mary Ann McDonald, Sacramento, CA  -- Banner Tag
Sandra Hull, Arlington, VA         -- List Vet

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                       Pet Terrorist Groups
            RUNNERS UP list  --  Crimes Against Humor
------------------------------------------------------------------

Abu-Nidalmation: Identified by tell-tale spots on their turbans
           (Paul Paternoster, Los Altos, CA)

al Fido: Decry Western-style toilets with lids that close so you
can't drink from them
           (Melanie Stephens, Manassas, VA)

Animals for the Ethical Treatment of People:  Pets should take
care of themselves and stop treating humans as slaves
           (Greg Pearson, Arlington, VA)

Aum Shih Tzu
           (Bill Strider, Gaithersburg, MD)

Black Lab September
           (Martin Bredeck, Hybla Valley, VA)

Canine Socialist Union: Proletariat brotherhood fighting
the fascist-capitalist oppression of freedom-loving dogs
struggling under the... IS THAT A BISCUIT?!?! Yes, I'm a
good dog. Look, I'm sitting! Give me the biscuit!
           (James Knowles, Bellingham, WA)

Hairballah
           (Martin Bredeck, Hybla Valley, VA)
           (Justin Cascio, Perth Amboy, NJ)

Irish Setter Republican Army
           (Justin Cascio, Perth Amboy, NJ)
           (Dave Ferry, Leesburg, VA)
           (Patrick O'Driscoll, St Louis, MO)
           (Bob Van Voris, New York, NY)
           (Kevin Paul Wickart, Normal, IL)

Pol Pot Bellied Pigs
           (Travis Ruetenik, Honolulu, HI)

SPECTRE: Special Executive for Canine Terrorism, Rump-sniffing
and Extortion
           (Bob Van Voris, New York, NY)

The Aquarium Clouders
           (Travis Ruetenik, Honolulu, HI)

The Golden Retriever Path- seeking to punish the people who
fake out dogs by only pretending to throw the ball
           (Patrick O'Driscoll, St Louis, MO)


Runner Up list name
           (Bill Strider, Gaithersburg, MD)


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