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                        Finicky, schminicky.


                           April 26, 2004


        The Top 9 Signs Cats Have Taken Over the Government


 9> The nation's new closest ally: Egypt.

 8> There's a whole new meaning to a Congressional committee's
    burying a bill.

 7> All dogs have been rounded up and sent to Guantanamo.

 6> NASA, the FBI, the CIA and the Department of Defense are all
    dedicated to one task: unlocking the mysterious canned 
    tuna/electric can opener connection. 

 5> New cabinet post: Secretary of the Department of Shiny Things.

 4> Fire hydrants are now surrounded by electric fencing.

 3> Forget to clean the litter box? Hello, IRS auditor.

 2> The Constitution has been amended to prohibit vacuum cleaners.
    (This is also a sign that bachelors have taken over the
    government).


                 and the Number 1 Sign Cats Have 
                  Taken Over the Government...


 1> Al Gore is being used as a scratching post.



             [   Copyright 2004 by Chris White    ]
             [       http://www.topfive.com       ]


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Selected from 47 submissions from 16 contributors.
Today's Top5 Pets List authors are:
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Rabbi Crut, Bowling Green, OH             -- 1 (6th #1)
James Knowles, Bellingham, WA             -- 2, 6, Topic
Mark Weiss, Austin, TX                    -- 3
Kobus Myburgh, Vanderbijlpark, S. Africa  -- 4
RW Lipp, Lenexa, KS                       -- 5
Neal Stringer, Spring Hill, FL            -- 7 (Rookie!)
Adam Chunn, Houston, TX                   -- 8, 9
Melanie Stephens, Manassas, VA            -- Runner Up list name
Scott Bostick, Lake Ridge, VA             -- Banner Tag
Sandra Hull, Arlington, VA                -- List Vet

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            Signs Cats Have Taken Over the Government
                 RUNNERS UP list -- Lame Ducks
------------------------------------------------------------------

"We will not falter in the war on terror -- Oh! Look! There's a 
mouse in Iraq!"
          (Jim Phynn, Horsham, PA)

All tuna fishermen are drafted into government service.
          (Geoff Brown, Ann Arbor, MI)

Congress works one hour a day and spends the other 23 sleeping,
eating and acting important and aloof. So no real difference.
          (Mark Weiss, Austin, TX)
          (Brad Wilkerson, Mesa, AZ)

Every April 15 you can hear the IRS purring.
          (James Knowles, Bellingham, WA)

Mailmen are now allowed to shoot dogs on sight.
          (Mark Weiss, Austin, TX)

Old national pastime: Baseball.
New national pastime: Shake the string.
          (Brad Wilkerson, Mesa, AZ)

Presidents' Day moved from between Lincoln's and Washington's 
birthdays to Garfield's.
          (Rabbi Crut, Bowling Green, OH)

The Washington Monument is covered in carpeting and topped with a
jingly mouse on a spring.
          (Geoff Brown, Ann Arbor, MI)
          (Jim Phynn, Horsham, PA)


Runner Up list name
          (Melanie Stephens, Manassas, VA)

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